The Race Against Physics OR The Turd Bucket Debacle

Oh where do I start with this late, late post? How about subject matter and language warnings?

Well, let’s go back to that horse ranch; the good one with the crappy power supply. See here.

I’ve been asked about the bucket full of turds on several occasions, so I think it’s about time we tell everyone about that particular disaster.

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Past and Future Plans, As of Today

As you have seen if you follow our blog, our plans go wonky very quickly. We bounce back, but at no point do our goals ever stay static simply because life throws us too many curve balls for that to ever be a thing.

Case in point, our trip to Vancouver Island last winter.

We weren’t sure if we were going to try to stay on the Island or not. Going back and forth is expensive, especially with the ferry fee. But we don’t have a setup capable of handling Manitoba’s frigid winters.

We started on the Island volunteering. But the trip had been far more expensive than planned. Right away, though, I was able to land a job with an arborist. Even though I was also supposed to be volunteering, I couldn’t very well turn down a steady paycheque. I managed to handle both for several weeks.

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To Sell a Van: Part 5

Part 4

Part 3

Part 2

Part 1

So after the lights went out in Vegas, we had to get to California with the van and meet the buyer.

The original plan was to meet him in Santa Clarita at the car rental lot, do the trade and take the last of the cash, drive to the ocean, then head back to Vegas. Because the hotels and flights everywhere within a thousand miles were vastly more expensive than staying in Vegas.

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And Then… There Was One!

Where have we been!?

Normally I do posts several months after the fact, but this is an update as of today!

I am now working 50 hours per week landscaping and am working on getting my air brake endorsement. I am also teaching a wild edibles class every other week, had to buy and fix a second vehicle so that Lyndsay can take Aurora to classes and things and get a part time job (and there is more to do on both vehicles), am trying to find time to write two books (one fiction and one non-fiction), and of course still need Shabbat off for family time.

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To Sell A Van: Part 3

Part 1

Part 2

In roughly five hour stints we would be going from North Dakota down Highway 15 to Las Vegas.

While going through Idaho we stopped at Hell’s Half Acre. We’d been driving through agricultural land and then suddenly were in the middle of an old lava field. It was a very striking difference in terrain, so we stopped for a walk.

Next was Salt Lake City where we stopped to get Mexican food. Unfortunately it sucked. It was bland to the point of being nearly tasteless.

Nice scenery, though.

Next was St. George.

Mormon church.

St. George was a rather interesting place. Claiming to be a “dry” town, all bars and liquor stores only sold beer.

Yeah, I don’t get it either…

Our friend Dave–along for the ride on another one of our crazy adventures– went to the bar and had interesting discussions with the locals. They liked talking to visitors and were very friendly and welcoming. So welcoming that they told you all about how welcoming they are. Everyone is welcome in St. George, not just Mormons! Whites, blacks, natives, Christians, Jews… “But not Muslims. Have you read the Koran? They want to kill us!” (I’m not making that up, this was what they said.)

The next day, leaving a dry Mormon town in a rape van, we were stopped by the police for having expired plates. We had to explain our temporary registration to the officer who declared while trying to understand the forms, “they do things weird in Canada.” Thankfully he was satisfied with the temporary registration forms and let us continue on our way.

From St. George it was on to Las Vegas. And let me tell you, to this day, that was the most beautiful drive we’ve been on. The highway went up and down hills with cliff walls to each side. It was phenomenal and I’m sorry that we don’t have pictures!

So things weren’t so bad, other than dumping 2 to 5 litres of oil into the van every time we fueled up.

We decided to stay two nights in Vegas due to how cheap the hotels were and it was three days before we could drop off the van. And the cheapest place we found to stay?

The Hooters hotel on the strip.

With a baby.

At a booby buffet.

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To Sell A Van: Part 2

Part 1

After doing some work on the engine and changing the oil (and receiving the money), we booked some hotels and headed south!

First things first; getting stopped at the border.

We were not surprised. We were straight up driving what looked like a rape van or drug van… We pulled over, sat for an hour while they searched our stuff and (with somewhat bemused expressions) sent us on our way.

And then literally seconds after taking this photo… Aurora threw up.

After cleaning up baby vomit, we were on the road again! We drove through North Dakota and just past the painted valley and Teddy Roosevelt park (beautiful area; highly recommended), we began to smell smoke.

We pulled over and found that there was no oil in the engine. Oil I’d just changed myself.

We dumped bottle after bottle after bottle of oil into the engine, finally filling it from empty. We drove to the local Ford shop and they agreed to take a look despite being booked up.

The oil pan seal had failed.

And the only way to fix it on an old Econoline was to pull the engine. Over $1000 worth of work. American.

When we explained our situation, they told us our best bet was to get to our destination the shortest way possible and to buy cheap bulk oil from Walmart; refill the oil every time we gas up.

Oh, and the primary engine access was from inside the van, not the hood, so it wasn’t sealed. So as the oil leaked, we would continue to have trouble with smoke seeping into the van interior. Oil smoke. So we would have to drive with the windows down.

In early Spring when it was still below freezing outside.

When we stopped for the night we had to completely replan our route. No more San Francisco with friends. Luckily we had planned a much longer trip with longer stops, so we were able to decrease the amount of time on the road each day while still getting to the buyer on time.

So we decided to take Highway 15 to Vegas, then pop through Death Valley before selling the van in LA.

What else could possibly go wrong?

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To Sell a Van

Several events happened to us that made us decide to live a life in an RV. I was more interested in having land (still am, and we’re trying to sort life for that to happen), but Lyndsay wanted the life on the road. She had to convince me and we had to prove that Aurora could travel well.

Three major trips played large roles in our decision to live in an RV full time. The first was the trip to Las Vegas and California to sell Lyndsay’s shagin’ wagon… I mean her drug runner… I mean her heart van.

We had been living in downtown Winnipeg and her van was just sitting parked outdoors. It was rusting, its paint was fading, and it was costing us $50 per month to store.

Lyndsay was deeply in love with Tasty. I sometimes think she loved that van more than me! But we had a wedding to pay for, so we finally made the decision to sell it.

At first Lyndsay tried to sell locally. We got a few offers, but they were all below $1000. As the saying goes (I made it up myself), never send a Ukrainian to do a Jew’s job. I took over the sale process.

I took new (and old) pictures of the van and put it up online in several places, talking it up as a collector item. Within days, offers poured in from across the country from collectors looking to save the van. In short order, we received a phone call from a collector in California.

Now, this collector was the walking stereotype of the ignorant American. When trying to explain where Winnipeg is, he could barely comprehend that we were north of North Dakota; he had to look at a map. He was also the walking stereotype of an American with too much money. He talked my ear off (the cell phone bill had $200 in long distance charges) and during these conversations he told me how he’d taken his Porsche out of storage just before heavy rains and it got completely flooded.

After all that I decided I would be taking his money.

Lyndsay had paid $3000USD to buy the van in California. I convinced this collector to buy it for $4500 American, pay $3500 up front and we would deliver it to him.

(Side note: If you own or manage a sales lot in Manitoba, I’m for hire. Use the contact form.)

It was rather appropriate when you think about it. Lyndsay bought the van in California and it would be going home after a long tour of North America. The plan was simple: drive to San Francisco to visit a friend, drop off and collect the last of the money owed on the van, rent a car and drive through Death Valley (Lyndsay has always wanted to see Death Valley), stay a day in Vegas, go see the Grand Canyon, then fly home.

What could go wrong? Pictures to come!

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Drumheller and the Dinosaurs

On the road again! Can’t wait to get on the road again! Is that the full time RVer theme song?

After Manitou it was on to Drumheller and the Royal Tyrell Museum to see the dinosaurs!

First, here’s a pro-tip for parents taking their kid(s) to a museum. FACE PAINT! Lyndsay painted Aurora’s face and got her to pose at the exhibits. Aurora–normally very attention hungry and energetic–thought she was tricking people into thinking she was a part of the exhibit. She had fun, stayed still for lengthy periods of time, and everyone got to actually read the information without child interruptions.

Aaagh! Dinosaur! Oh, it’s just a kid.
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